no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
