I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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