she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
