I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
