grandma shit on top of the toilet
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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