ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
