This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
