Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
