I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
