omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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