I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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