I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
