i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
