Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
My ass is underappreciated
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
True strength comes from lack of pants
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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