Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
