no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
