Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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