No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
