he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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