So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
