lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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