How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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