If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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