Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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