you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
