In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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