I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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