okay pat passed out under dana's car
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
