doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
COCAINE IS GR8
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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