And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
