You're completely useless in the revolution.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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