You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize