Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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