Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize