Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
