Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
