When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize