just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Semen is not good for contacts.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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