so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
