Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
