so explain again why im purple
no
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize