She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
operation have a gay friend backfired
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Randomize
