what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
