Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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