That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
