Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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