hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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