So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Randomize
