What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
