Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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