at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
