Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
