Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
